


Not gay

by Plume8now



Series: ZoSan Prompts [7]
Category: One Piece
Genre: Fluff, Humor, M/M, Romance, Sanji not being that hetero after all, flirt, sexy!Zoro, tired!Sanji
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-11
Updated: 2016-08-11
Packaged: 2018-08-08 03:53:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,629
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7742311
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Plume8now/pseuds/Plume8now
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Inspired by the prompt: "Person A is harassed by a random stranger in a club and people B is watching. After a while Person B steps in and pretends to be Person A’s partner even though they never have seen each other before. Person A just goes with it, but the random stranger is so persistent and doesn’t believe they are a couple that Person A grabs Person B’s neck and kisses them. Somehow both of them don’t back out of the kiss, because, fuck can we never stop pretending?" AU</p>
            </blockquote>





	Not gay

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! So here's a new ZoSan! I really liked to write this one, it was fun!   
> Please enjoy!

The bar was noisy, full of people's talks and shouting and songs. Most of the girls were dancing on the dance floor, and some rare guys had joined them. The others were watching, chatting together, drinking alcohol, laughing.

Honestly, Sanji didn't know what the hell he was doing here. He should have gone home, after this hard day of work at the Baratie. After all, it was Saturday night, there had been costumers the whole day – meaning intense work – and instead of enjoying a peaceful moment at home, here he was, in this nasty club, thinking about... things.

He put his cigarette to his lips, thoughtful, staring at his glass of red wine in front of him.

“Hey there,” someone suddenly said by his side. “What is such a handsome guy like you doing here all alone?”

The cook turned and frowned, not recognizing the stranger who was currently facing him. He was tall, tanned skin, black hair, and stank alcohol. Only one look at him and he could tell the man had drank himself to death. He could have felt empathy for him, reacted kindly, but the guy looked just like the stupid drunken dude who wanted to prove himself a manliness he didn't have.

So he decided not to answer. He was not worth it, and he'll eventually just drop it and go see elsewhere.

“Uh?” the man leaned on him. “Is that wine? I like wine too, man! But that one's for the weak, y'know. Should try stronger ones some time.” he put his arm around Sanji's shoulders and the young man shivered, not expecting his touch. “I can offer you one.”

“No thanks,” he replied, shaking his head. “I'm fine.”

“Oh yeah? Then what about a walk? Let's go for a walk, I'm sure we have plenty of things to tell each other...”

Ew. His mouth was so close, the cook was now about to throw up. Why on Earth was this jerk hitting on him above all the costumers present tonight? He wasn't in the mood – and more importantly, he wasn't interested by men. This wasn't the first time it had happened, but it surely was one of the most unpleasant. Even him wasn't showing himself that onerous when it came to flirting with a woman.

First of all, before approaching a woman, he was always making sure he was looking good and presentable. First impressions were the secret of a future relationship, and everyone knew that. Except that damn man, who wasn't understanding he did not even want to talk to him. Maybe he should just leave now.

“Are you ignoring me, blondie?”

“I'm not gay, or bi. So, yeah. Not interested.”

Sanji stood up, moving away from him, and as he was taking his jacket on the back of his seat, a hand held it back. Frowning, he looked up, and the drunk, peering at him, smirked.

“Lemme walk you home, blondie.”

“Let me take my thing back, jackass, or you will regret it.”

Each man who'd tried to fight him until now could testimony his words. And they never tried again. It was only for the man's sake that he was warning him – he didn't care.

“Really? I'd like to see that.”

“Don't tempt-” he replied before interrupting himself as a green haired man appeared next to him, put his hand on his shoulder, and genuinely smiled at him. It was a great smile, and despite him, Sanji blushed. He was way too close.

“Sorry, I'm late babe,” he said. “Didn't see the hour, but it's never too late right? So, what's going on?” The man's smile grew bigger as he looked at the drunken jerk. “Oh, a new friend?” he kept on as he was already shaking the man's hand. “Hi, I'm Zoro, his boyfriend. Nice to meet you.”

His eyes grew wide opened as 'Zoro' was talking. But if Sanji was at first destabilized, he quickly got himself together after, while his 'soon-to-be-victim' looked at them, astonished. The young man used this spare time to glance at the man: green hair, tanned skin too – but less than the other –, feeling his chest so close to him, and by the look of his arms, Sanji guessed he was a man of sports.

“Well?”

“I thought you weren't gay?!” the ugly shouted out of anger.

“Oh, but he's not,” Zoro grinned. “Only for me.”

Sanji sketched an awkward smile, not knowing whether to push him away too, or to let him keep acting. On the one hand he felt like the situation had gotten worst, and that he now had to fight _two_ guys – which he could handle, but was annoyed to do so –, but on the other hand... the other man''s reaction turned out to be amusing and he found it funny. Who was embarrassed now?

“I-I don't believe you,” the man stammered, frustrated. “I think you're his friend and you're trying to break our moment.”

Sanji pulled a face to the word  _“moment_ ” _,_ obviously not sharing his point of view. Zoro chuckled without the other noticing, too deep into his discourse.

“... Cause you're jealous. Or even more, you're just a random guy who just wanted to flirt with him too, and you're making a bad guy of me!”

“Man,” Sanji hissed, “you drank too much, your mind's going crazy. And, you know, maybe it's also none of your damn busi-”

Zoro raised his hand to make him shut, still grinning.

“Sweetheart, I think the gentleman wants us to prove our love,” he said as he entwined their fingers and all of the sudden grabbed Sanji's neck to kiss him. The cook's cheeks immediately went red while Zoro groaned. Sanji, taken away by the passion he wasn't expecting, put his body against his, sliding his hand on his waist.

He was almost breathless when they parted. They stared at each other, and the other man looked both surprised and disappointed. He left without a word, dully rumbling.

Sanji wiped his mouth with his sleeve, staring at Zoro in horror.

“Did you _have to_ put the tongue? Seriously?!”

“Hey,” the man replied, “I kinda made you a favor here, don't tell me you would have preferred to do that with Mr. Boozer.”

“Yeah, I could have dealt with him myself but thanks,” he looked at him before adding “I guess. My name's Sanji, by the way.”

“Great. Just so you know, I'm never going to do that again.”

The cook frowned. “Of course you're not!”

“I was talking about the loving nicknames. First, not my type, and second, doesn't suit you.”

“Oh. Then what would suit me, according to you?”

“I don't know...” he smirked. “Curly brow.”

Sanji glared at the man, not really approving this new nickname.

“Don't go there, _marimo._ ”

Zoro sat next to him, asked for a beer, and only after that, answered him.

“'Marimo', really?”

“Oh, I can do better. Moss head. Algea. Letuce for brain.”

“That's quite a vocabulary, indeed.”

Sanji didn't know why, but he felt better. More at ease. Even though this man seemed to be a pain in the ass, there was something about him he liked. He couldn't help but blush again to the thought of 'liking him' after what they had just done, not even five minutes ago. He wished he could say that kiss had been nothing, but honestly? That must had been one of the best in his entire life, and he hated to confess it. At least, he'd never admit it out loud.

“Did the kiss bother you?”

“Hu? Oh, yeah! I mean-”

“You mean, you're straight, and never kissed a man before, right? Sorry I stole your first time with a complete stranger.”

He didn't reply and nodded.

“Oh fuck,” Zoro suddenly swore, “he's back!” and before Sanji got time to even react, he grabbed his tie and kissed him again.

Panicked, Sanji let himself melt against Zoro's pressure, and gave in without resisting at the beginning. He felt warm, and the other's hot body taking over his wasn't helping  _at all_ . He then tried to fight back, did take more control of the... whatever was happening, and that felt great. He felt so good it felt as if he were reviving again – as if he had never  _really_ enjoyed anything until now.

Zoro was the first to put an end to their kiss, and this time, they both were breathless.

“Oi, there are _rooms_ for this kind of stuffs,” the barman said as he was looking for more glasses.

“Fuck...” Sanji cursed as he looked around and noticed the drunken man wasn't 'coming back' as he was suspecting it.

“So you _did_ enjoy this,” Zoro pointed out. “Are you really straight?”

“I swear I am,” the cook replied, not really believing it himself.

“Then I was right, you must be only gay for me.”

Sanji looked at him in the eyes, and only thought about how handsome and a bastard the other man was. These were both strange and mixed feelings for the same person, and he felt like he couldn't be more lost.

“I think I need to go,” he quickly said.

“Wanna see each other again some time?” Zoro replied.

“Never again,” the answer snapped.

“Liar.”

Sanji closed his eyes as took a deep breath.

“Shut up, damn marimo.”

“My number's in your jeans' pocket. Do whatever you want with it.”

“Great, it'll be less cold this winter,” the young man said, thinking about feeding his fire with the paper.

Zoro stared at him.  _Innuendos, innuendos_ . Realizing what he just said, Sanji got redder than before turned his back on him, swearing he'd kill him if they were to meet again.

The world was so little, no doubt he'll have to keep his promise.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you liked it, please let me know what you've thought about it in a comment!   
> Thank you for reading!


End file.
